3.02.2006

ready for a deep one?



Originally, this post was just going to be a "tell me what's so GREAT about 30" kind of deal. That angle was bothering me though...it implies that I'm dreading thirty and need you all to cheer me up. That the age itself; the 3 decade duration - is troublesome to me. And that's not the case. I don't think thirty is "old." As a matter of fact, I'm much happier now than I've ever been before. I have my husband and sons and am close to my parents and siblings. I'm more content with my appearance than I've ever been (sure, they're are wrinkles and a few pounds to drop but I'm good with that!) I'm working (not my dream job but I'm grateful for it at this point!) and I'm enjoying a hobby that is *more* than a hobby. Life is good.

I've spent the past few days kind of short with my family, a little irrational, a lot emotional. It was pissing me off that making the transition from 29 to 30 was affecting me that way. Normally, I'm not short, irrational or overly-emotional...at least I don't think so...

Then, yesterday, I think I realized what's really bothering me. I wanted to make a statement for my 30th birthday. Not a big party or day out. I wanted to do something, for myself, that would really stand out as a milestone years from now. It isn't something anyone else could have done for me - it was all about me doing something, ANYTHING, to remember this time, this moment, this *only* day ever that I'll be this age - an age most people consider a milestone.

So, I'm a bit disappointed in myself. Disappointed that I spent an inordinate amount of time trying to pinpont the cause of my malaise, waiting for my epiphany, rather than doing something to correct it.

These words will go in my scrapbook. Or maybe a time capsule to be opened in *9* years...that will remind me what a loser I was this year (kidding!) and give me a year headstart on 40. Yeah, that will be the legacy of 30...a time capsule of sorts. Life at 30 to be compared to life at 40. What do you think?

(OK, so it wan't really that deep afterall...)

23 comments:

  1. Happy "I didn't know it was your birthday" Birthday! I will be 30 this year too and I've been wondering how it will affect me...if at all. Great journaling for a page and I love the time capsule idea!

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  2. sunni_j9:58 AM

    Oh, I am excited for you...looking back from 50 to 30~~~you are in for the VERY best times of your life....enjoy each minute, as the years really do go by faster than you will realize it. May you enjoy love, laughter, and many many smiles. You are on a path that couldn't be sweeter....Enjoy!!!

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  3. Ah, a girl after my own heart! Those milestone birthdays deserve much deeper reflection than the shallow beauty-related, woe-is-me kind normally associated with them. Love the time capsule idea! Happy birthday! Oh, I want to know if you just shrug when you start seeing grey hairs. Just curious! ; ) Kendra

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  4. wishing you the happiest of birthdays my friend. wishing you nothing but the best - exactly what you deserve!

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  5. wishing you a very very happy birthday. believe me (and this is BIG coming from a person that was freaked out about 30! lol!) it isnt all that bad, in fact, 30 has been good so far. You have the best years of your life ahead of you, so do something big for yourself, something you have never done, something you wanted to do. It will be GOOD! love ya!

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  6. Happy, happy birthday, Erica! You are adorable! Love your thoughts on 30! I hope you have a wonderful day!

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  7. Shannon Z2:47 PM

    Have the happiest of birthdays!!!! Enjoy this decade- the 5 years I have had in it have been awesome!!!!

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  8. Someone hand me a rope, that WAS deep... :) HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERICA, you rock -- 30, 40, or 90 we'll still email. :)

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  9. maureen5:34 PM

    Happy Happy Happy Birthday sweet Erica!!
    Loved reading every single word :)
    You know me...I always have lots to say....but in 28 days, I will have my last birthday....because I will turn 39 and you know what they say...."39 forever" right?! UGH! I have been happiest in my 30's. I had my girls before I turned 30....and have enjoyed my 30s with them as well as having John when I was 35 1/2 :) I have loved my 30's and I'll tell you what....I will enjoy my last year of being in my 30s while you enjoy your 1st year of your 30s...deal? Okay!
    Hugs my friend!!! I wish I had known before now :P

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  10. E, I can tell you that I have been the happiest EVER these past five years...although 30 was a hard one when it happened. If it makes you feel any better I will be 36 this year:(
    (In just under two short months in fact:P)

    I will tell you though that I got my navel pierced for my 30th...would suggest NOT making that type of statement. Took it out at 31:D

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  11. Happy birthday friend!!! So wish I could be there to celebrate and live it up with you :)

    I know that your 30's are going to be FABULOUS! lots of good things ahead I predict!

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  12. I HOPE YOU HAVE/HAD AN AWESOME BIRTHDAY, ERICA!! 30 IS NOT OLD AT ALL, AND I AM SO GLAD YOU ARE HAPPY AND ARE BLESSED W/YOUR LIFE! YOU ARE AN AMAZING INSPIRATION TO SO MANY!! =)

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  13. Happy 30th, girl! It really is just a number - and I have so loved my 30s (so far, at least!!!) Hope you had a wonderful day!

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  14. I hope you had a happy day....

    You kick ass :) And that's pretty mushy :)

    See you for our big date saturday!!

    xo
    Jenni

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  15. yes it was deep! happy flippin bday first off, second off...just because you dang bday has passed does not mean you can't do something amazing for yourself today....JUST GO DO IT!!! and then journal to your 40 yr. old self how you had a kick ass time, just a couple days late, cause you are too busy living an AMAZING life. (at least this is what I would do...) again...happy bday. :o)

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  16. Happy Belated Birthday Erica! Geez, what a depressing post! Totally kidding! It's normal I think to go thru a range of emotions when having a milestone birthday. Sounds like you're handling it very well. :-)
    Robin

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  17. Happy belated b-day girl!!!

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  18. Happy BIRTHDAY, Erica!! Having just hit this milestone myself, I can really relate. The few days right before my birthday stunk. I love being 30...

    Of course a huge trip or shindig would've made it all better...

    You're going to rock this decade. :)

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  19. peg manrique11:23 AM

    well, happy belated bday, girlie! hope it was great!! don't have much philosophical to say today, but your 30's will rock ;-)!!

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  20. Happy Birthday Erica!!!! I hope that you had a fabulous day!!! Hugs girl!

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  21. Sorry I missed your birthday. Hope you had a great one.

    Here's to the beginning of your next thirty years!

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  22. melanie12:09 AM

    Darn! I totally missed your bday! Congrats on turning the big 3-0, you young thing! ;-) I had so many great things happen to me during my 30's, and I'm sure your best years are yet to come. Enjoy them to the fullest E! ( if we ever meet, maybe we can have the kind of 10 year age diff friendship that CathyZ and TaraW have, huh? LOL :P) Big bday smooches from me to you!!!! :)

    mel xoxo

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  23. happy happy birthday!!! i turn 30 on tuesday. luckily i have the HOF calls to take my mind off the big 3-0. =P LOL!

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